A New Reason to Invest in a Thigh Master

If you have been wondering where you stuff all that fear and anger that you think you have gotten rid of, you might want to check your thighs. I was at my first “neuro-skeletal-muscular-structuring” appointment yesterday (think slightly-less-than-relaxing massage with the intent of straightening your body) and after having my body assessed (always fun) she was beginning to work on my ‘structure.’ I won’t bore you with all the nuances of what is off with my body but as she was working on my quadriceps she inserted this tidbit: our thigh muscles are where we store the emotions of fear and anger. Interesting. She went on to say that I shouldn’t be surprised if I felt “off” later in the day, perhaps like I was PMSing. She then told me of someone who had had this done and came back the next day and said, “I don’t know what it was, but for some reason last night all I wanted to do find you and kill you.” Interesting. Thus, she likes to give the disclaimer before one might feel that way.

I must say, the rest of the day I did feel somewhat irritable. I wondered if it was just a matter of self-fulfilling prophecy. But then again, I have felt somewhat irritable the past few days so it wasn’t anything too particularly out of the ordinary. And I have been trying to pinpoint exactly what it is that has been off, so to be able to blame it on tbe fear and anger that had been hiding in my thighs was somewhat of a relief. Like when you get your period and think, “ohhhh, that’s why I’ve been so funky.” I realize to those who don’t have this monthly luxury this may seem odd—I mean you should see it coming, right? Doesn’t this happen every four (or so) weeks?? Yet, and I don’t know why, for some reason it can be like a monthly memory lapse. What I do know is that it is usually such a relief to be able to pinpoint what the heck was the culprit of the ability to shift from inconsolable sadness to inconceivable rage in a split second (note: lest you think it a good idea to suggest to someone they might be suffering from a monthly memory lapse, think again. This is only appropriate if you too are capable of PMS).

The point is this: sometimes it is nice to have a concrete reason as to why you feel the way you do. And while my current reason is perhaps counterproductive in some ways, today I am perfectly content to place the blame on my thighs. And yeah, yeah, yeah, I have taken enough counseling courses over the years and been in enough counseling to know that the real work is trying to figure out why my thighs had some fear and anger to begin with. At this point, however it has been more fun to ponder why it is your thighs that store these particular emotions. Really, of all the emotions to be stored in your thighs, how funny is it that it’s these two? I’m guessing (unfortunately) for most women, it wouldn’t be quite fitting to have your thighs store contentment and happiness.

So the next time you are feeling extra anxious or angry and are looking for a reason why, you might want to consider dusting off your old ThighMaster or doing some squats followed by some stretches, and then you will and least have the option of blaming it on your thighs.